


No Red Flowers, No Red Sweaters

by terminallyCosplay



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Depression, Kankri trying to understand, Momorosa is great, No Red Sweaters, The psiionic freaks out a bit, mild swearing, moirail, the signless sort of has depression, toastyhat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-19
Updated: 2014-10-19
Packaged: 2018-02-21 18:58:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2478971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/terminallyCosplay/pseuds/terminallyCosplay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a few months of traveling with the gang, Kankri is still getting used to every day life with the Signless, Disciple, Psiionic, and Dolorosa after mysteriously ending up on Alternia.</p><p>Based on No Red Sweaters by Toasty Hat!</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Red Flowers, No Red Sweaters

**Author's Note:**

> Please Note:  
> Vantas=Kankri  
> Kankri= Signless  
> This is for Toasty Hat!

Like every night beforehand, Vantas brought out his sickles, preparing to spar. This pattern had become a particular part of his life lately. He stood behind the Signless, waiting patiently. After a while, he put his sickle to him, waiting for him to respond. The Signless put his hand on the handle, pushing them down and away.

“Not tonight,” the Signless said, sighing.

Kankri lowered his sickles, looking at him, and then towards Psii, who simply shrugged. How did he describe what was happening? He watched as Kankri slunk into himself, looking away from the group. He bit his lower lip, looking at the rest of them.

“Did I do something wrong?” Vantas asked.

“Eh, Porrim, you got thith one right?” Psii asked quietly.

She simply nodded, getting up and leaving their cave, motioning to Vantas to follow her. He put up his sickles, looking confused at Meulin as she wrapped herself around the Signless, gently kissing the tips of his horns. He was concerned, to say the least, and also slightly hurt. He had never seen Signless so weak or worn out before. He shuffled a bit, until Mituna pushed him out of the cave. Porrim steered him out into the moonlight, checking around almost subconsciously for hidden foes. As he left, he could barely here the Signless say “no one’s listening.”

“I don’t get it,” Vantas said. “Does he- I didn’t do something to trigger him, did I? If so, I should return immediately and apologize.”

“No, you did nothing, grubling. Here, come here,” she sat down on a log, and patted the space next to him. When he didn’t move at first, she simply started talking. “Did you have any friends in your group that would ever just lose hope for no reason and become upset? You mentioned that you had 12 friends.”

“I don’t think so. They were very diverse in characteristics that I can’t be certain of their actions every day.”

He managed to finally stop talking in long-winded statements most of the time, finally understanding that Alternian time was precious and that he couldn’t waste a moment of it.

“Alright, I will do my best to explain it, though it is hard. There is no word for this concept after all... as his lusus it is hard for me to watch, but alas, that is all I could ever do.”

He sat down next to her, looking up at her. He shivered, and she wrapped an arm around him. He glanced at her tattoos, part of a past that she had yet to talk about.  She looked down at him. He was starting to grow hair patches on the side of his face as well. He was so young, and he reminded her so much of her own child.

“So, what did I do?” Vantas finally asked.

“Well, you did nothing. Sometimes, no one does anything. I found an analogy to explain this, so bear with me for a bit so we can get through this. Pretend that you are in a field, covered with flowers. There are a lot of them. There are so many flowers around you. One of your friends comes, and you give them some of those flowers. Imagine that.”

“Okay.”

He imagined his own Meulin coming over. He imagined them picking flowers together and arranging them into delicate flower crowns for the two of them to wear. It was a common past time of theirs, whenever she had visited him.  

“Now dear, I want you to imagine that she leaves, and that those flowers are gone forever. You can’t get them back, no matter how hard you try. They’re gone. You’ve lost those flowers, and it’s really early in the morning. You try to be careful as you move, but as you go, you accidentally tread on other flowers. You’re busy cooking breakfast, and you accidentally set a few of them on fire. Those flowers are also gone.”

He nodded his head, trying to keep track of the flowers in his field, and how many of them are gone.

“Alright,” he said, sighing. “I don’t understand what this means. What does it have to do with anything?”

“Just keep with me. Another friend comes over. This one also wants more of your flowers. They don’t ask, however, they just start ripping them from the earth. They take more than you are willing to give. They take a large amount of your flowers.”

He imagined his Mituna coming in, on his skateboard. He would crash, destroying flowers after flower, and when he got up, he went about trampling a large portion of them. He tried stopping him, but the more he did, the more he destroyed.

“Alright, you see how many flowers you’ve lost, and you’ve only dealt with two people?” she asked.

“Yes, I see that. They just wantonly destroy your field, without any consideration to what you have. They do not comprehend that these flowers are precious to you.” He told her.

“Yes, good, you’re grasping this. Psii and Meulin had issues with the concept at first, but they, over time, also grasped this. This isn’t bad for someone who has yet to be properly school fed,” she beamed.

She ruffled his hair, smiling at him. He pulled his hood up, drawing closer to her to relieve the cold. She frowned.

“I’ll hurry the analogy. Kankri also had issues staying warm in his wriggler days. We’ve been through two friends, you have nine more to go. Some of your friends will come, and you will give them flowers willingly, but you always give them more than you can spare. You give away a lot. Your other friends, they come and they take flowers, or they destroy them. They don’t always mean to, but they do. You spend an entire day, and your flower field is very different than it was at moonrise.” She told him.

He hugged his knees, thinking of his flower field, broken and void of almost all flowers. He felt sad about it.

“Is that what he’s feeling?” he asked, looking up at her.

She offered him a soft smile, nodding her head.

“That happens to him every day, however, flowers take a long time to regrow, child. Imagine waking up, and your same friend coming back. She wants more flowers, and you give her more.”

He imagined Porrim coming, or Meenah, and him braiding flowers into their hair. They deserved flowers.

“Now imagine that one of your friends comes by again, and sets your field on fire.”

He imagined Damara coming in, tossing her cigarette into the field and lighting it on fire. He imagined the field burning, the grin that she bore so proudly and maliciously at times. He never asked what happened to cause that, nor did he really want to.

“This friend- this friend burns it all,” she said. “It may not have been their intention,” she added. “But they do,” she told him.

He rubbed his face.

“Now imagine someone comes by, someone you care for, and you want to give them flowers, but you have no more to give.”

“I can’t.”

“Exactly. That is how Kankri is at this moment. His field is gone and burned and broken, and he may want to give you more flowers, but he can’t.” she explained. “It’s not because he doesn’t care, but because he can’t take anymore.”

“Oh,” Vantas says softly, looking at the ground and scuffing his toes against the dirt. “That’s terrible. Is there anything we can do?” He asked.

She smiled wide. “Sometimes, people give flowers back, and he can either give those flowers, or use them himself for himself. It’s important to sometimes sit back and enjoy one’s flowers.” She told him.

He nodded his head, getting up.

“Thanks, Dolorosa! I think I get it now. Thanks!”

He ran off, ignoring her shouts about needing to go out with someone. He knew what to do. The woods here were starting to become familiar. His feet flew faster than he knew he could run, because now, he had a purpose.

 

* * *

 

Mituna was pacing the floor, casting glances at the Dolorosa.

“He just ran off?” he asked again, for probably the 14th time.

“Yes, dear, he just ran off. I didn’t get a chance to stop him or talk to him.”

“He just took off.” He repeated.

“I’m going to take something off _if you don’t stop asking,”_ Meulin threatened, baring her fangs.

He gulped, going back to pacing. She sighed, then took him by the shoulders, sitting him down.

“We’ve scouted this area dozens of times. We’re not on any paths, there are no known high blood zones in the area. He’s fine, Tuna,” Meulin said.

“Says you, but the guy has never fought! The guy has never once gotten into a fight! What if he gets into one, or a wrigglerless lusus gets at him?! What if he’s by himself and he has to defend-“

She shooshed him, glancing towards another part of the cave, indicating that she didn’t want the Signless to know. He let out a little hiss at her, and she hissed right back.

There were footsteps at the mouth of the cave, followed by a distinct crash, and a muttering of a distinct lack of care about how the front of their hive looked. Mituna went up in a flash, hands around his shoulders and shaking the small troll. 

_“THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING, RUNNING OFF ON YOUR OWN?!”_

Vantas flinched, looking away from him. He looked up, then back down, taking in a deep breath. He hadn’t expected this reaction.

“ _YOU COULD HAVE BEEN HURT, YOU COULD HAVE BEEN TAKEN, YOU COULD HAVE BEEN FUCKING CULLED-“_

“Mituna, stop, you’re scaring him, came a weary voice from further in.

Vantas looked up at him, his eyes distant. He felt numb. Kankri came over, prying Mituna’s hands off of him. He let out a small sniffle, and Mituna practically let go of him as if he would catch on fire or break.

“Shit, kid, I’m sorry. You’re not in trouble- we were just worried as hell you just ran off with no one-“

“Shhh,” Kankri said. “It’s alright, he’s here safe, everyone is fine, Mituna. The kid made it home alright.”

The group stands around awkwardly, and Kankri looks at the smaller troll. Meulin clears her throat, and the Dolorosa starts herding them back to the bottom, where the fire is burning.

“Vantas, you’re so cold, please, sit by the fire- Meulin, can you grab a fur or two?” she asked.

Meulin nodded, dashing off to get it, and Dolorosa sat him down, removing his cold and partially wet cape. She looked at his hands and arms, noticing the scratches on them. She made a tsk sound as she looked at him, and he looked back at her.

“Where did you even run to, Child? We were so concerned for you.”

“Stupid grub stunt, there. You were finally starting to not act like a fucking wriggler,” Mituna grumbled at him.

The Dolorosa ran a hand through his curls, and he looked up at her, mumbling something. She tilted her head.

“What was that, Child?” she asked again.

“I was thinking about what you told me,” he managed to say. "I didn't think it would be such a problem. I'm sorry," he added quietly.

He wiped his eyes, then his nose. Meulin came back, wrapping the warm fur around his shoulders. He looked around at them.

“Well, why did you run off?” Meulin asked.

“I… the flower field. I was so sad about the flower field that I went out and found one,” he explained.

Kankri looked over at him, as Vantas started to nervously fiddle with his sleeve.

“You went out to find a flower field?” Mituna asked. “That’s the dumbest shit-“

Dolorosa glared at him.

“Okay, so you went to a flower field. Why would you do that?” she asked.

“You said that Kankri ran out of flowers, and I didn’t want that. He gives away all of his flowers, every day. He doesn’t keep any for himself, so I went out and made this.”

He uncaptcha’d something, and Kankri looked at it. It was a delicate crown made of red roses, and he smiled. The kid had gotten scratched up from the thorns. He laughed lightly.

“They weren’t meant to be literal flowers,” he said gruffly, roughly shaking his shoulder.

Vantas held it up to him, and the Signless looked at it, smiling.

“Well, now you have real ones, to remind you that we’re here to give you flowers when you need them, just like all of you keep leaving them for me,” Vantas said.

He grinned, putting the flower crown on Kankri’s head. He had to stand up on tiptoe to reach the top of the other's head. He then went over to Meulin, pulling out another one, apologizing for the lack of green flowers. He then pulled out a blue one for the Dolorosa, then looked over at Mituna, who was looking at the wall instead of at him.

“I even made one for you, Mituna,” he said, coming over.

“Oh, I can’t wait to see-“

He pulled one out compromised of mainly yellow flowers, with red and blue flowers tucked into it. Mituna took it, then placed it on his own head, letting out a little laugh.

“Come, Vantas, you had a long night, it’s time for you to rest,” the Dolorosa said, hurrying him off to the side of the cave.

He tried protesting, but soon, he was off to sleep. Mituna muttered something about having some business to do.

None of them were surprised when he came back with an armful of flowers, putting them in a pile near Vantas, with a solitary flower crown on it. It was roughly made, but that was the best he could do. 

“Same,” he told the sleeping kid, everyone tucking in for a day in the caves.  _  
_

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by Toasty Hat's No Red Sweaters comic on Tumblr. It was based on just one panel of Kankri and Vantas, so I hope I did the characters justice!


End file.
